As a Christian parent what would you do?

[KathleenA]

Dear Christian friends
My son is aged 38 is highly intelligent however lacks common sense to live well. He makes bad financial decisions. He got saved recently and I am trusting that the Lord is working in his life. He just got out of a bad relationship and I hope he is going to straighten out his life. The immediate problem is that he doesnt have a descent car. he bought one for $200 so you can immagine. I am concerned about his and his daughters safety. I trust God is working in his life. The thing I am wrestling with is whether I should purchase him a car. I found one reasonable that an elderly lady took good care of. Its more money that he can afford right now. What would you do? I know we are to trust God but also sometimes we need to come up along side another who is in trouble. And yet I think he needs to learn lessons. I just want him or his daughter injured or killed because of poor judgements he mades. It appears he has no sense of urgency or danger.
What would you do? They left my home tonight and I prayed the Lord would watch over them on the road.

 

[Hebrews11]

Luke 11:11 If a son shall ask bread of you that is a father : will you he give him a stone? or if he ask a fish, will he for a fish give him a serpent? or if he shall ask for egg, will he offer him a scorpion? If ye being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children: how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holly spirit to them that ask him?

Do you know how to give good gifts..?

The me see if I am reading this right your concerned for his and daughters safety because of a very cheap car but you want him to learn lessons..

WOW.. you must have the Holliness of GOD to be able to say something like that.. how SHAMEFULL of you... IF GOD wanted you to learn from your mistakes you would be dead by now.. Death is the price of sin.

If your son is a new christian and you are his mother and your a professing christian.. Then you should be doing everything in your power to demostrate the love and FORGIVINESS OF JESUS CHRIST>. not teach leasons..

Is he not now a new creature in christ and new creation.?and yet your holding the sins and mistakes of the past on him.. SHAME ON YOU

While we are responsible for bad financial decisions.. maybe now would be the time to discuss how to properly spend his money in a christian life.. Now is the time to help grow and learn and instruct in the LORD.

AndI pray they do not become involved in some sort of accident because you are concerned about this and yet struggle with doing right? I will say some prayers for you as well

Kevin

 

[KathleenA]

Thank you for your reply Kevin however you do not know the rest of the story. I have instructed, I have helped. I gave him $1500 at Christmas toward a car and he bought this one for $200. Now, is your reply still the same?
I feel some judgement from you here. I want this man of 38 to stand on his own feet also. I am torn. I want to buy him a car. I am just asking God whether that is the right thing.

 

[Hebrews11]

Kathleen...,

My relpy is based on what your wrote..,, The First version... yes I do stand by that...

Now you have a second version,, with more of the facts.. Those 2 extra lines are important to your first question do you not think...? I believe based on the your 1st story yes I stand by my reponse wholeheartly..

Now that you have included you giving money to him knowing full well he is incapable of making good sound financial decisions., Dont you think it would have been best just to go car shopping with him and you pay for the car instead of giving him the money... Its like giving money to a alcholic and telling him to buy food.. knowing full well he is going to buy booze yet hoping this time he will make a right choice..

Now if you feel he just might sell the car instead then keep the title in your name.. I firmly believe as christian parents especially when our children become new christian to do all we can.. but without becoming enablers for their bad actions... Your son sounds like he needs acountiblity and discipleship from a strong christian mentor..,

If your son cannot even be trusted to have a car, to keep that car you bought for him then do not do it.. There has to be accountiblity on his part..That is something you can teach your son... if you cant be accountable for the money I give there will be no more money forth coming.. You have every right to purchase the car or keep in your name based on past actions.
only you know what your son might do.. based upon that is how I proceed


He may be a man of 38 but he is a new christian.. a babe in christ. Now he has to start growing up all over again.. with your help of course

But I am sorry Sister your statement on him needing to learn lessons is not for you to decide in the least.. The is the job of our Heavenly Father not ours.

It is your part.. to pray, to help, to council, to inform, to give instruction on what the bible says to do with our money, and to have a clear conscience that you do all you could.

In Love

Kevin

 

[faithwalker]

I may not be a parent but in my opinion I dont think you should buy him a car. I think you did a good thing by helping with the money towards the new car at christmas. I know it might seem that your son doesnt know what he is doing but he is a man and he does need to make his own desicions no matter how bad they are. What you can do is give him advice and try to lead him in the right way. All you can do is pray for him to do the right thing and to pray for his protection. No offense or anything but you cant protect him forever and he has to learn how to make it on his own. Everyone makes bad mistakes but you learn from them and it helps you become a better person after. Like I said all you can do is pray for his protection and that he makes the right choices. I hope my advice helps.

 

[KathleenA]

Hello Faithwalker...I thank you for your reply to my post.

 

[hymnsinger93]

well, you must look out for your sons morals. But if a new car is what he needs, tell him you will loan him the money, and give him a date to pay you back, and if he doesn't, threaten him that you will increase the amount. Because he may need a car for his safety, but he needs to learn to live on his own and not always depend on you.

hymnsinger93