How does it feel, seeing your closest friend die? You create a huge bond with her and realize she's weak at heart, slowly perishing away. Someone who went through many things, death of friends, a mother who tried to kill her own daughter.. You sit still and think: Why her?
You create a huge bond with her only within 2 months. You've shed so many tears, you could fill an entire bathtub with it. You sit in a country so far away from United States, and have no money to even pay her a visit. You two spend a lot of time together, talking, laughing.. You sit through her last moments by chat, she barely can type. Her closest friend does it for her.
You get frustrated, rage on everything. You blame God for letting her die so soon, and blame yourself because you're so useless, pathetic and worthless in all ways. You fall into a deep level of depression, cry nonstop and start begging God to spare her. He tells you "no". It doesn't take you long to accept her death and ask God to take her to Heaven instead.
She died. You don't even cry for now, but during the night, you break down again. Two hours of nonstop cries as your friends tries to cheer you up.
Someone tells you she's alive. You stop and wonder "What? How and why?" That's why. God brought her back to life, as He even spoke with your friend. Weeks and miserable pain, and two years of doubts towards God, you finally realize multiple things.
You pushed your Father away yet He kept holding your hand, to bring you closer. The closer you were, the more it hurt.. but now it feels great.
That's the story of me and my friend Kaimaya. She's fine and alive now, she plans to get married and have wonderful children.
---
Sometimes I wonder if I spoke too early? Yesterday I found out she's at the hospital again.
You create a huge bond with her only within 2 months. You've shed so many tears, you could fill an entire bathtub with it. You sit in a country so far away from United States, and have no money to even pay her a visit. You two spend a lot of time together, talking, laughing.. You sit through her last moments by chat, she barely can type. Her closest friend does it for her.
You get frustrated, rage on everything. You blame God for letting her die so soon, and blame yourself because you're so useless, pathetic and worthless in all ways. You fall into a deep level of depression, cry nonstop and start begging God to spare her. He tells you "no". It doesn't take you long to accept her death and ask God to take her to Heaven instead.
She died. You don't even cry for now, but during the night, you break down again. Two hours of nonstop cries as your friends tries to cheer you up.
Someone tells you she's alive. You stop and wonder "What? How and why?" That's why. God brought her back to life, as He even spoke with your friend. Weeks and miserable pain, and two years of doubts towards God, you finally realize multiple things.
You pushed your Father away yet He kept holding your hand, to bring you closer. The closer you were, the more it hurt.. but now it feels great.
That's the story of me and my friend Kaimaya. She's fine and alive now, she plans to get married and have wonderful children.
---
Sometimes I wonder if I spoke too early? Yesterday I found out she's at the hospital again.
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