Greetings everyone,
This is my first post here. I've been coming here from time to time to gain some insights and answers from fellow Christians on more particular-sensitive topics. I can't help and notice that there are a lot of threads about people waiting for soul mates and asking questions about His timing, etc. So I thought I want to start a discussion about this issue, whether or not this is actually the "truth". I am hoping for people to give their view on this, I am not here for "debate".
Ok here goes.... I for one, used to hold the believe that God has prepared someone for me. As a 24yo male, I have never dated anyone in my life because I hold a view that "my first girlfriend will be my last" and my girlfriend will ended up being my wife. I'm not the one who actually go out and look for this "future partner" of mine, since again.... I know that God has prepared someone for me, therefore I don't need to try to look for one. It's all according to His time, not mine. My future wife will naturally found her way to me, be attracted, etc etc...
Anyways... My view was challenged when my church decided to hold a relationship-class for young adults. In this class, we were taught the opposite! God doesn't prepare anyone for us... It's up to us to look for one.... This is the verse where it is based from.
1 Corinthians 7:8-9 - Now to the unmarried and the widow I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried as I do. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. (NIV)
Immediately from the verse above, we know what Paul wrote is an advice... not commandment.... I'd like to change our focus to the "widow" as highlighted. As Paul have suggested, it is good for them not to remarry... But they are free to do so if they wills it, it is not a sin before God. Widows have the freedom to remarry. So if God does prepare someone for all of us, there will be a few issues going on with this.... For example:
Annie is a widow who just lost/divorced her husband. There is a guy name Bobby who became close to her. Annie is faced with decision whether or not to remarry Bobby.
Now suppose that God does prepare Bobby as Annie's soulmate.
If Annie say YES to remarry: then it is all a happy ending... Annie's previous husband wasn't someone that God prepared, it was Bobby all along! It's only natural that it happens this way!
If Annie say NO to remarry: It's good for Annie to do this as Paul suggested!..... but... what happens to Bobby? God have prepared him for Annie, but now she said no... is it fair for Bobby to lose his soulmate because of her decision?
Also, with this whole view that my future partner will naturally be attracted to me, etc etc... I realized that this is so horribly incorrect, because this is saying that God has "predestined" her emotions, therefore taking away her freedom. I know that the God I follow never enforces His will, He wants the very best for us, but will never take away our freewill.
What my church taught me is that.... God gives us freedom to look for our partner, but we should first ask God. Whenever we are attracted to somebody, we should ask Him to discern for us about this person. Pray... Fast... and Look...
If someone disagree to the above, please share us your insight.
This is my first post here. I've been coming here from time to time to gain some insights and answers from fellow Christians on more particular-sensitive topics. I can't help and notice that there are a lot of threads about people waiting for soul mates and asking questions about His timing, etc. So I thought I want to start a discussion about this issue, whether or not this is actually the "truth". I am hoping for people to give their view on this, I am not here for "debate".
Ok here goes.... I for one, used to hold the believe that God has prepared someone for me. As a 24yo male, I have never dated anyone in my life because I hold a view that "my first girlfriend will be my last" and my girlfriend will ended up being my wife. I'm not the one who actually go out and look for this "future partner" of mine, since again.... I know that God has prepared someone for me, therefore I don't need to try to look for one. It's all according to His time, not mine. My future wife will naturally found her way to me, be attracted, etc etc...
Anyways... My view was challenged when my church decided to hold a relationship-class for young adults. In this class, we were taught the opposite! God doesn't prepare anyone for us... It's up to us to look for one.... This is the verse where it is based from.
1 Corinthians 7:8-9 - Now to the unmarried and the widow I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried as I do. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. (NIV)
Immediately from the verse above, we know what Paul wrote is an advice... not commandment.... I'd like to change our focus to the "widow" as highlighted. As Paul have suggested, it is good for them not to remarry... But they are free to do so if they wills it, it is not a sin before God. Widows have the freedom to remarry. So if God does prepare someone for all of us, there will be a few issues going on with this.... For example:
Annie is a widow who just lost/divorced her husband. There is a guy name Bobby who became close to her. Annie is faced with decision whether or not to remarry Bobby.
Now suppose that God does prepare Bobby as Annie's soulmate.
If Annie say YES to remarry: then it is all a happy ending... Annie's previous husband wasn't someone that God prepared, it was Bobby all along! It's only natural that it happens this way!
If Annie say NO to remarry: It's good for Annie to do this as Paul suggested!..... but... what happens to Bobby? God have prepared him for Annie, but now she said no... is it fair for Bobby to lose his soulmate because of her decision?
Also, with this whole view that my future partner will naturally be attracted to me, etc etc... I realized that this is so horribly incorrect, because this is saying that God has "predestined" her emotions, therefore taking away her freedom. I know that the God I follow never enforces His will, He wants the very best for us, but will never take away our freewill.
What my church taught me is that.... God gives us freedom to look for our partner, but we should first ask God. Whenever we are attracted to somebody, we should ask Him to discern for us about this person. Pray... Fast... and Look...
If someone disagree to the above, please share us your insight.
