pebosworth
Member
- Joined
- Dec 24, 2007
- Messages
- 158
My testimony was too long to put in my profile so I decided to post it here.
I grew up thinking I was a Christian, but the only worry that I had was if I would get the chance to ask forforgiveness of my sins before I died. You see, I was taught that all I needed was to believe in Jesus Christ and ask Him to forgive my sins. No one taught me about repentence and what believing in Him means.
So I lived my life the way I wanted to. I smoked, swore, drank, tried drugs, fornicated, you name it, I probably did it.But funny enough, I still thought I was a good person. I didn't exactly murder anyone. As far as I concerned there was a lot of people worse than me. I prayed often, asking God to forgive my sins (not naming them, just asking for forgiveness in general). Truth be it, I didn't even know what sin was. My conscience told me right from wrong, but hey the world convinced me that it's normal and therefore it's fine.
The one sin I did know about was adultery. I didn't know how many different forms it came in (like lust, fornication etc.) but I knew that it was one of the 10 Commandments. If you asked me then what the 10 Commandments were I would have said: "Don't make for yourself an idol (thinking a physical statue of some sort); Don't murder (that was obviously killing cold bloodedly); and do not commit adultery (have an affair with another man when you are married)."
My understanding of the 10 Commandments was not very clear, but commiting adultery was pretty straight forward to me, like commiting murder. It never occured to me that I broke any of the other commandments and I was told that God was a loving God that would forgive me if I asked for forgiveness, so I never worried about the chances of going to hell.
Then I fell pregnant by a man that I had just dumped. I took him back thinking I must love him and felt that I wanted to marry him. So I did. We got married, but 6 months into the marriage we had serious issues. I found out that I didn't really love him, and was very unhappy. My usual trend with relationships was the same. I would date a guy for a few months and get sick of him and before I could even dump him I somehow managed to meet another man whom I thought I loved. Anyway to cut a long story short, I somehow managed to meet another man whom I fell in love with while I was still married. So I divorced my husband for this man. The guilt started creeping up on me day after day until I finally cracked. I started investigating if God was angry at me and if I would now go to hell. I was worried that this time he wouldn't forgive me so I studied and investigated Christianity. My new boyfriend was also a Christian who had backsliden. And through the help of each other (and of course the Holy Spirit), we both got saved and repented. We got married 2 years ago and are now pregnant with out first child.
I came to the realization that without repentence it is impossible to be saved and that you cannot just believe anyone who professes the name of the Lord Jesus Christ to be a Christian. Christianity is not a religion, it is a way of life!
I grew up thinking I was a Christian, but the only worry that I had was if I would get the chance to ask forforgiveness of my sins before I died. You see, I was taught that all I needed was to believe in Jesus Christ and ask Him to forgive my sins. No one taught me about repentence and what believing in Him means.
So I lived my life the way I wanted to. I smoked, swore, drank, tried drugs, fornicated, you name it, I probably did it.But funny enough, I still thought I was a good person. I didn't exactly murder anyone. As far as I concerned there was a lot of people worse than me. I prayed often, asking God to forgive my sins (not naming them, just asking for forgiveness in general). Truth be it, I didn't even know what sin was. My conscience told me right from wrong, but hey the world convinced me that it's normal and therefore it's fine.
The one sin I did know about was adultery. I didn't know how many different forms it came in (like lust, fornication etc.) but I knew that it was one of the 10 Commandments. If you asked me then what the 10 Commandments were I would have said: "Don't make for yourself an idol (thinking a physical statue of some sort); Don't murder (that was obviously killing cold bloodedly); and do not commit adultery (have an affair with another man when you are married)."
My understanding of the 10 Commandments was not very clear, but commiting adultery was pretty straight forward to me, like commiting murder. It never occured to me that I broke any of the other commandments and I was told that God was a loving God that would forgive me if I asked for forgiveness, so I never worried about the chances of going to hell.
Then I fell pregnant by a man that I had just dumped. I took him back thinking I must love him and felt that I wanted to marry him. So I did. We got married, but 6 months into the marriage we had serious issues. I found out that I didn't really love him, and was very unhappy. My usual trend with relationships was the same. I would date a guy for a few months and get sick of him and before I could even dump him I somehow managed to meet another man whom I thought I loved. Anyway to cut a long story short, I somehow managed to meet another man whom I fell in love with while I was still married. So I divorced my husband for this man. The guilt started creeping up on me day after day until I finally cracked. I started investigating if God was angry at me and if I would now go to hell. I was worried that this time he wouldn't forgive me so I studied and investigated Christianity. My new boyfriend was also a Christian who had backsliden. And through the help of each other (and of course the Holy Spirit), we both got saved and repented. We got married 2 years ago and are now pregnant with out first child.
I came to the realization that without repentence it is impossible to be saved and that you cannot just believe anyone who professes the name of the Lord Jesus Christ to be a Christian. Christianity is not a religion, it is a way of life!
