My Life and Problems, guidence please...

[leggomyegg]

All right...I'm trying to get back into God, but i need an outside opinion on how to help clean up a little, well this is my story.

So I want to get close to God again as i have drifted from him over the past few months. I started Drinking, cursing A LOT, obsessed with sex, and started caring less about other people. It started first when my best friend basically stabbed me in the back and abandoned me for a girl that he liked. (This guy is one of the two people that originally led me to Christ.) The other person that led me to God is a girl who i have fallen in love with. This girl has told me that she feels the same way towards me but on multiple occasions has dropped me to go after other guys. We're still best friends and she still says she like me but I don't believe her but I can't leave her alone, I feel like I have to be there to protect her if something goes wrong for her. Well I also started drinking, mainly Vodka. I get drunk usually atleast twice a week. And i'm afraid it's gonna get worse or i'll start using drugs to try and get a better affect...Through all of this I guess i've gone into some sort of Depression and have stopped eating (and I have thought of killing myself in different ways mostly by gun or hanging)(sorry if this is TMI). I'll eat normally one day, then not eat for the next week. My parent's don't notice because my mom works all the time and my dad is in the army and is stationed in South Korea right now for a year. Which being alone all the time led me to experiment with their alcohol cabinet. If anyone can help, Please do...P.S. I am willing to do anything, but I don't want to lose the girl...I can't imagine living without her, We've been best friends for so long, I guess i can't help it...She also led me to God so i feel really attached to her, I can't explain how much I love her even though she has used me so much before...but please can someone help me?

 

[SpiritLedEd]

Well I also started drinking, mainly Vodka. I get drunk usually atleast twice a week. And i'm afraid it's gonna get worse or i'll start using drugs to try and get a better affect...

Check out some AlcoholicsAnonymous meetings in your area and don't start out claiming "I'm not an alcoholic." How much you drink or how often you drink doesn't matter. What matters is why you drink. Alcoholics are found in cardboard "houses" on river banks, in nice apartments and nice houses. They are found in our schools and colleges. They work as truck drivers, ministers, CEOs and in all other professions. Check the meetings out before you judge us. In my years of sobriety, I've heard many young people speak of issues like yours. You're not alone. I'm a sober member of AA myself.

Spirit Led Ed (SLE)

 

[HoneyBare]

All right...I'm trying to get back into God, but i need an outside opinion on how to help clean up a little, well this is my story.

So I want to get close to God again as i have drifted from him over the past few months. I started Drinking, cursing A LOT, obsessed with sex, and started caring less about other people. It started first when my best friend basically stabbed me in the back and abandoned me for a girl that he liked. (This guy is one of the two people that originally led me to Christ.) The other person that led me to God is a girl who i have fallen in love with. This girl has told me that she feels the same way towards me but on multiple occasions has dropped me to go after other guys. We're still best friends and she still says she like me but I don't believe her but I can't leave her alone, I feel like I have to be there to protect her if something goes wrong for her. Well I also started drinking, mainly Vodka. I get drunk usually atleast twice a week. And i'm afraid it's gonna get worse or i'll start using drugs to try and get a better affect...Through all of this I guess i've gone into some sort of Depression and have stopped eating (and I have thought of killing myself in different ways mostly by gun or hanging)(sorry if this is TMI). I'll eat normally one day, then not eat for the next week. My parent's don't notice because my mom works all the time and my dad is in the army and is stationed in South Korea right now for a year. Which being alone all the time led me to experiment with their alcohol cabinet. If anyone can help, Please do...P.S. I am willing to do anything, but I don't want to lose the girl...I can't imagine living without her, We've been best friends for so long, I guess i can't help it...She also led me to God so i feel really attached to her, I can't explain how much I love her even though she has used me so much before...but please can someone help me?

Leggo, I am not a teen anymore, so I don't want to sound like I am judging you or anything, but I remember when I was one. lol

Sex and drinking are the main things that got me into trouble. It doesn't matter if you are a Christian (you say you're trying to "get back into God"). The fact is, Father made us in such a way that sex and drinking at such a young age can capture our minds and cause us to be out of control. We can't think of anything much more than that. That is why He gave us rules. He knows what happens to our minds.

There isn't much you can do at this point in your experiences with sex and drugs except to renew your mind with His Word. But that takes discipline, which I know is a bad word at this point. But try to do the hard thing, for eternities sake. Ask God to give you the strength because frankly, you are on the same path I took, and it wasn't until I turned 60 that I discovered that Heavenly Father loved me enough that He gave me an Instruction Book. You already know this instruction book, so put your mind to reading it and renew your mind. Sorry if I sound harsh, but I will take every opportunity to steer a young person away from the same path I took. Oh, and I agree with the person who suggested to also get into AA.

I will pray you make the right decision. Bonnie

 

[SpiritLedEd]

But try to do the hard thing, for eternities sake. Ask God to give you the strength

Reminds me of a favorite saying: We cannot think our way into right acting, but we can act our way in to right thinking.

SLE

 

[InProgression]

Similar story

I was a backslider and I fell from the grace of God. I was young and I didnt know a thing about how to be saved, so I backslider...it was like quitting cold turkey for the things I was doing bad. I was embarassed to repent because I had did ungodly things...but just recently I got saved. I think you need to take baby steps. Begin my praying and trusting in God, read the word and ask God for clarity and understanding. Join an AA group and talk to ppl that are in christ. God will judge you by your heart.
1 Samuel 16:7 (English Standard Version)

7But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart."

 

[Alice.]

I would really see a doctor, if you are having thoughts of suicide and depression, you can't just sit around and do nothing about it. Talk to your mother, get help, and when you see the doctor, tell them about your alcohol issues and your fears that accompany them.

 

[tirapet]

Do you have a Youth Group or Bible Studies or anything similar in your area? How often do you go to church? How often do you crack open your Bible?

You sound lonely and bored. Maybe that's why you're obsessing over your gal pal and drinking and cursing...? Just try to catch yourself swearing whenever you can. Try to think clean and not about sex. It will be difficult, but in Matthew 5:28, the Bible says, "But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart." NIV

Have your mom lock up the alcohol as to take away the temptation to drink.

Do not try drugs. You don't need all that addiction and trouble in your life. Exercise better helps with making you happy.

Concerning your gal pal, I know it won't help any and it'll prolly only frustrate you by saying this, but that girl isn't right for you. You say she chases other guys, well, what if you two start a relationship. She may dump you for some other guys, and later she might come back to you apologizing and wanting you back. Treating you like a backup lover. And imagine what dating could do to your friendship if the two of you breakup. You don't want to lose such a close, long-time friend. But I'm just guessing on this based on what you wrote. She may be totally different in person. If she really is as Christian as you say, she shouldn't act like this. She is to try to act like Jesus. It isn't fair of her to lead you on. Confront her nicely and see what the deal is. It's not really Christian-like behavior.
There is a phrase that goes around that says something like a person should be so lost in God that another must find them. Remember that with this girl.
You may have to let this girl go romantically and try to stay friends. Give it a go. If she isn't making you happy, then she isn't right for you. You deserve someone Christian who is worthy of you and doesn't use you like a Kleenex. God will send someone your way if that is what He intends for you. Patience is a virtue.

You should forgive the friend who stabbed you in the back. Don't hold a grudge. Check out James 5:9 and Leviticus 19:18.

Depression hurts. Journaling and writing poetry helps to get one's feelings out so give it a try if it makes you feel better (but go into it with a positive attitude otherwise if you think it won't work, then it won't). I think one of the greatest feelings would be to teach others (especially young children) about the Word of God so if you could lead a Bible Study or help out with children at church, it may be for the best because you're helping them and yourself out. Knowing you made a difference in someone's life is an amazing feeling. Also, chocolate and exercise help SO MUCH with one's happiness. They release some sort of chemical into your brain that makes you happy. Keep eating, too! Food is a wonder thing! God would not have given us taste buds if he didn't want us to enjoy the numerous flavors of all the foods. Try little by little to eat every day. Exercise--as tough as it is to get up off the couch and do those first twenty push-ups--helps to keep the body God gave you in shape.

Do not try suicide as a way out. Can you imagine the hurt, the shockwaves, that people would feel as a result. I bet you've watched shows where they do numerous spoofs of how much one person really means to a community and family. So don't try it. Jesus died for you. For everyone. So that we may live for him. Is suicide any way to pay him back? Sorry if that's harsh, but it's true.

Write your father letters if you are able. Tell him--if you're comfortable with talking to him about your struggles--how you feel. Or talk with your mom. She'll be there for you. It's her job to raise you and point you in the right direction. It may be embarresing and difficult, but could be in your favor to ask for help. Muster up the courage and tell her how her absense is hurting you.

Much of this takes discipline and dedication on your part. Do you want to change? Admitting you have these problems was one of the most difficult parts to overcome, but it will be a difficult path as well. Don't get discouraged! God may give you props for trying, but he doesn't look too well on those who were lazy and gave up.

My suggestions to you are to read your Bible more and get up and out of the house (go participate in something...start a Bible study, fundraise for homeless, go on a mission trip, volunteer to help at Sunday School, etc.). And keep yourself busy. If you're busy enough, you won't have time to drink or think about sex because you'll have more better things on your mind to concentrate on.

Keep praying and bring all your problems to God. Just talk to Him. He wants you to. Tell him how you feel, about your days, your problems. He'll listen even if it feels like no one is there for you. God always is. He makes miracles everyday.

Well wishes!!

 

[LovingUJesus]

HI leggo,
I too struggle with addiction and feel like sometimes the only way to get away from my pain or dull it is to run to that addiction because it feels like its the one thing the will always be there for me and will always provide me with some relief even if only for a second. But obviously it is not the right route. I think the best thing you can do is pray, you might not feel God at the moment and though you may feel so far from him that doenst mean he isnt there. And talking to him is the best way to reconnect, and i also find praying really helpful when i am really lonely. When my depression got really bad i was mad at God and didnt pray at all, all that did was make things so much worse. Jesus brings something addiction cant, Love. Take care

 

[SpiritLedEd]

HI leggo,I too struggle with addiction and feel like sometimes the only way to get away from my pain or dull it is to run to that addiction because it feels like its the one thing the will always be there for me and will always provide me with some relief even if only for a second.

Pray, meditate on Jas 1:2-4, get involved in a 12-step recovery program, and settle in for the long haul because victory over addictions is not an event; it is a process.

SLE

 

[coachforChrist]

Peace be unto you

Jesus, Who truly dwells in the very center of your spirit, is the ONLY one Who can truly help you. Simply turn within to Jesus, as often as needed, and simply pray Lord Jesus, be merciful to me a sinner.

That one act of your will, gives Our Truly Good Father and Savior Jesus, the permission that He needs from you, to start little by little, working all things together for your good.

Remember, God's Love ALWAYS draws you INWARD to Jesus within your spirit. The devil uses the cares and pleasures and vanity of this present evil world are used as BAIT to draw you away from quiet time and fellowship with Jesus, because he knows that if he can get you to love the things of the world, more than Jesus, then your spirit will shrivel up, instead of getting stronger little by little as Our Truly Good Father wants.

Concerning drinking, men and women drink in order to be happy or to be temporarily relieved from their suffering. But Jesus truly offers a better way. Instead of drinking the temporary evil wine of this present evil world, Jesus invites you to simply Drink The New Wine of His Holy Blood for your spiritual well being and for the forgiveness of your sins.

Friends and girls come and go in life, and most of them are evil and lead you away from Eternal Life, so they are not worth it. Pray that God will surround you with His Grace like a shield, and help you to trust ONLY JESUS HIMSELF within your spirit, WHOLEHEARTEDLY truly and forever, every moment, for every thing that troubles you. Proverbs 3:5,6,7,8 Then, little by little, God will sort your friends out for you, and little by little bring

Let your goal be to WHOLEHEARTEDLY trust and seek and abide in and love God Our Father and Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ Himself INWARDLY. Simply pray The Lord's Prayer and Psalms 51 every day slowly, asking God to help you understand and to give you His Grace every day for every thing that worries you.

1 Peter 5:7, "Casting all your care upon (Jesus) Him, for He (Jesus)
cares for you."

In Christ,
John