My mom...

[Jesusluvsme]

Last night, I was speaking to my mother, and I was discussing something with her, and then she got all upset but then.... she said, well, that just adds another problem that I have to deal with between you and your brother (Totally acting like we're burdens or something), so then I said, well, what problems are you going through, and she wouldn't tell me, and then she told me, that is why I don't talk to you that often, because everytime I call I don't have very much to say, and then I said, really? I thought our relationship was improving. And then she said, Our relationship is SO DISTANT, that I don't really feel comfortable calling you that often. So then I asked her why she felt that way, and she told me, well, after you sent me that email that you sent me, I feel like I can't talk to you. (She used to nag me about getting my tubes tied after this baby, when I already KNEW what and when I need to sign the papers, but she would always nag me about it everytime we spoke with each other. (Long story... THERE IS A HISTORY BEHIND OUR DISTANT RELATIONSHIP... IT DIDN'T JUST START WITH AN EMAIL TELLING HER SHE DOESN"T HAVE TO TELL ME EVERY TIME SHE CALLS TO MAKE SURE I SIGN THE PAPERS.... SHE BELIEVES MY CHILDREN ARE MISTAKES), so then I told her, well, it just bothers me that u behave like my children are mistakes. And then we changed the subject to how the kids are doing, and stuff like that. When I told her I am having twins, she made a really sarcastic laugh like she couldn't BELIEvE that I was having twins, like I was CURSED or something, but now I feel like it is a blessing. Well, my question is, I have been praying that our relationship will improve, but it hasn't AT ALL. Could this be a sign from the Lord that I am to just drop her, and stop communicating with her altogether since all she has to say is negative things to me, and when I bring it to her attention that it really hurts my feelings when she says hurtful things to me, she gets all upset because she feels she has a right to hurt my feelings, and I am carrying TWINS, and any kind of stress can make me go into premature labor at any time....

 

[ICHTHUS]

ell, i'm not a parent or nothign but hey i give you what i have kinda lernt.

God wants us to love people feverantly and love God hole heartedly. somehtign pretty close to that i am sure of it.. LOL well any way God made Adam right. and he looked basically lonely in the garden of Eden so he created Eve from Adam so Adam woudl have some body to play with kinda thing and keep him company.. well my poitn is Thus. why woudl God want any one to stop talkgint to each other. Specially being a mother and daughter or family member. i have recently had HEAPS a problems with my Mother she left me again and hey well she is back now and basically puts across the VIBE that she hates me, but i still love her and try to talk to her cos i knwo deep down some where thats it's the rigth thing to do... i believe that your problem presists with the enemy. tellign you not to talk to your mother. sure enough we all need BREAKS and stuff. but NOT drop it altogether. God loves evry one and we should love our neighbour as we love our selves and stuff. well that includes your family... so keep at it i b prayign for ya!!

Love Simon!!!

 

[Jesusluvsme]

Hi...

Did u read the scripture in the bible where he said that he wants us to forsake even OUR FAMILY MEMBERS for him?

 

[ICHTHUS]

nope but i still dotn htink that he woudl want you not to be talkgin to your mum i mean that is pretty. like OUT there i feel even for God tbu then i have not met the man in Physical form so yeha i wouldnt really know how wild and far out he can be i knwo he is PRETTY AMAZIGN though. so yeah...

Love simon!!!

 

[Aimz]

Did u read the scripture in the bible where he said that he wants us to forsake even OUR FAMILY MEMBERS for him?

i think wot is meant by this is that he wants us to put Him 1st, not our family members.. an so follow him....

but do u have a refernce for it?

 

[Sleepy]

If your mum is doing you harm perhaps keep a low profile for a little while but think about what motivates her words. She may just feel worry for you and if that's what motivates her you know that beneath the words lies a mum who loves you and wants the best for you.

Mums aren't perfect. We expect them to be but they do for the most of us, love us even though some find it difficult to express in the right way.

I don't claim to know but I think if God asks us to sacrifice our family members it is just that ... a sacrifice, perhaps leaving them to go on a mission for God, letting them go if they are sick and God is calling them home or sharing them with others who need them more.

I'm sure God would want us to resolve all relationships with love and if it is his will for us to part for a time to do so in love, causing no pain to others or ourselves for if we part in anger and resentment it only leads to regret and sorrow.

God is Love.

I will pray for you

God Bless

 

[Jesusluvsme]

I read your reply, and I never have any negative things to say to her. TRUST ME, if u knew the history BEHIND all of this, you would see that she is a very hateful person towards me and my brother. (Mostly me, because I am the only one that she says the mean and angry things to, and she wants to be able to cause frustration, and anger with me because she is so bent on making others hurt and have their feeling being tormented like hers probably are for whatever reason). If u can send me a private message with ur email address, I could send you the WHOLE history behind all of this, and then u will truly understand WHY she is the way she is towards me. However, yes, I am just basically going to keep my distance from her. What bothers me is that she portrays our relationship to everyone as being a close one, but HERE SHE IS ADMITTING that our relationship is distant.

 

[Jesusluvsme]

I don't remember exactly what scripture it is, but I will look for it tonight, and come back to this thread and let u know, because my cousin is a preacher, and he even pointed me to the scripture.

 

[Jesusluvsme]

She doesn't give a rat's butt about me, trust me. If I miscarried one of my twins right now, she would be glad. In fact with one of my kids, she told me one time, when I was having problems with my now husband, he was my boyfriend at the time (This was before I became saved), she told me the only way I could come home is if I ABORT my baby. I was five months pregnant at the time, and MY OWN COUSIN was going to take me down to the abortion clinic the next morning! And i told her I AM NOT GETTING AN ABORTION! I DON'T BELIEVE IN ABORTIONS! So then she said, well, that is the only way you can come home. But I thank God everyday for my children (The two I have now, and the two that are on the way). I wish I can tell you the whole history behind my mother's feelings towards me so that you guys won't think I am just whining about some disagreement we have. Well, u can email me at GodsProphetess718@yahoo.com and I will email you the WHOLE story on WHY our relationship is the way it is now.

 

[Sleepy]

Praying and thinking about you

God Loves you deeply

Your problems are firmly in his hands

I will keep praying for you and your Mum. I have no doubt there is a lot of hurt so you are firmly in my thoughts and prayers. God Bless

Love Sleepy

 

[AlabasterBox]

I think the only solution here is prayer and forgiveness. You need to accept where your mom is at and pray for her. You can not change her only Jesus Christ can. In the mean time you need to forgive her. I know that is hard with all that has been said. But you have to reach deep down and trust God, and forgive her. I am sorry that things are the way they are. Once again only God can change them, keep your eyes on Him, and pray that he will soften your mom's heart.

Your sister in christ,
AlabasterBox :girl:

:rainbow:

 

[Jesusluvsme]

Thank you to everyone who put their input, and Alabaster, I have already forgiven. That is why I feel so free after I sent her that email telling her we need to "love" each other from a distance, by calling each other on holidays and birthdays only. I am pregnant with twins, and I CANNOT sacrifice my sanity, nor my health for this woman, whether she is my mother or not. I am still praying for her, I talk to God about her everyday, you know? The only sadness I feel is that my OWN FAMILY doesn't call me because she has got them fooled, too.... That SHE is the victim here, and I am just the EVIL DAUGHTER who is putting her through so much when really it is her. I didn't come here to make anyone feel sorry for me or anything, I just needed some advice, and that is exactly what I got. Thank you so much, you guys.

 

[Cognitive]

Hi Jesusluvsme,
If you can forgive your mom and dont let these feelings you have distract you from God.
You will see that your mom underneath all this, is teaching you how to become a better mom to your own kids.

Thats the best gift a mother can give, no matter how she does it.

Be strong and love her for the mom she is.