Hello! I desperately need help. I’ve been trying to get right with God lately and it just keeps feeling like the devil won’t let me go. I struggle so much with my bad emotions every time something happens that I feel is hurtful to me. I just don’t feel right in my heart a lot of times....I’m carrying a lot of bitterness, resentment, hatred, and anger as well as some other negative feelings. I do have these feelings for more than one person sometimes but it seems like I’m mostly feeling it for my boyfriend’s mom at the moment and I’ve been feeling this way towards her for several years now. I’m hoping someone can just pray for my heart so that I can just be a light in this world for Jesus instead of something ugly. Please Lord Jesus fix me.
Hi Beauty, thanks for the honesty in your post, I think a lot of us can identify with how you feel. It's what the Apostle Paul calls 'our sinful nature'. It's an ongoing war and one you should never surrender and give up on or you'll feel so low and worthless. No keep at it girl, you may lose one or two small skirmishes or battles but the war itself has already been won, you just have to wait around for a while for the victory parade!
Can I please urge you to at least once a month to read the sermon on the mount, Matthew chapters 5-7? It's largely theoretical rather than practical but it gives you a clear insight as to how a perfect life is lived. Then pray, asking for the Holy Spirit to be your backbone, pushing you, guiding you and steering you away from that sinful nature and towards that light that's God's holy will and purpose in your life. Keep telling God you love Him, He loves to hear it. Praise Him and tell Him why you love Him, He loves hearing that even more.
Please try to lose the negative in your head and replace it with a deep love, fondness and adoration of the God who sent His Son to die to give you the reassurance that your name is written in black marker pen in His book of Life. There's a battle going on in your head with little devils telling you that you're a worthless let down of a Christian and that you've blown it with God. They're talking so much rubbish, ignore them, God has loved you from even before you were conceived and He can hardly wait to welcome you into His Kingdom. God bless you sis.
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Dear Lord,
I want to pray for my dear sweet sister Beauty. I pray Lord that through your Holy Spirit you'll invade her life and thoughts and make them pure as only you can. I pray Lord that He'll give her a much deeper experience of you and love for you, her family, friends, brothers and sisters and most importantly of all, for these enemies who she hates and has done her some harm. Please God, cleanse the negative and replace it with your positive light.
We love you Lord because deep down, no matter how bad we sink or feel, we know that your loving care and rescue is only a prayer away. Thank you God for that love back up with limitless power. Thank you God, we love you Lord.
Amen.