Prayer

[jessid9]

I am coming to you my brothers and sisters for prayer. I am reaching out with the last ounce of strength both to God and to you for prayer against the enemy. For protection, deliverance and a revival in my home.

9 months ago to the day I lost myself. My husband left and I became a single mom lost in the world. Trying so desperatly to find myself and to survive. And 9 months ago I lost touch with God. I grew away from Him. Giving into the enemys lies, and exploring some of the worldy addictions. Alcohol, drugs, the list can go on but you understand the idea. And I am so ashamed. I once could hear Gods voice. I once could feel Him. I once put God first. I once felt His love for me. and all of that I had threw away. I have gone through so much in the last few months. physically, emotionally, and spiritually. THere was one occurence where I really thought it was going to get better. But the enemy came right back with 3 times as much and my strength was gone. I could not fight him anymore. And I remebered a scripture that the HOly Spirit had put on my heart a few months beore this all started..." HUmble yourselve under the mighty hand of God so that He may exalt you in due time". I cant do this on my own anymore. I have sheltered my life. I have fallen into the path of drugs and alcohol, depressed and lonely. I have no Christian influence in my life. I feel as if everyone has abodoned me. I feel alone. And not having God in my life .... that is the only one I cant live without. I need Him back.

The enemy has put the idea in my head that I cant tell anyone about my problems. I cant go for prayer because nobody can know how bad I was doing. they would think so bad of me. I would feel ashamed. But I cant live that lie anymore. I desperatly need help. I need Gods intervention. I need Him to step in. I need protection and deliverance. Please pray for my children as well. That God would protect them and help me to be the best mom I can be to His children.

You know I look back and all through this 9 months, despite how I denied God, He has taken care of me and my kids. He has given so much to us. a place, a vehicle, a job, the ability for me to go back to school for a (LPN) its just amazing. I am so overwhelmed. Despite how awful I have been, he still loves me. I need God. I need his guidance, his love, his grace. I cant live this lie anymore. I need His will to be done in my life. I want to do what He has called me to do. I want to use the gifts that He has given me to reach out to the lost. I want to use what I have been through in my life to reach to others. My testimony. And I do have faith and hope that it will happen. all in the right time. Its a growing process.

I thank you for your prayers. God Bless You

 

[sunshine307]

jessid9, Come to Jesus in full repentance and He will have you back, start afresh with Him and He will give you all the help you need. Don't listen to the lies of satan any more, it's time to make Jesus Lord of your life. God bless you for being so honest and open here, I will be praying for you. As you have already said "humble yourself under the mighty hand of God...." Feel free to pm me any time you need.

 

[fearnot]

Hi Jessid9

I will be praying for you through this all. The journey you are taking to get back with God. Satan will try all his best tacktics to keep you from God. Satan will use all the wrong that you have done agains you.

Remember God said, when we have repented of our sins, its moved away from us as far as the east is from the west.

God said we are worthy of His forgiveness and love and grace. So no-one else can take that away. God said you are worthy and He loves you no matter what.

Will keep you in prayer.

 

[Snowrose]

My dear sister,

When I read your thread, I saw me all over again. Oh how I can relate. You are so right my dear that the Lord has been there for you during this season. My husband left me with three children and shortly after the church I was going to - closed. Left alone not once but twice. During those times, the Lord was there for me – provided every need home, car, and a job. But oh the turmoil that I went through though – anger, bitterness, selfishness and distrust. These traits were revealed to me in that refiner’s fire and yet He still loved me. I didn’t go to substances to help me with my pain but I did look to people for help and encouragement. That in itself is not wrong but when it leaves Jesus in the back ground - it is problem. It is not our Lord that has left us – it's us that has left Him behind. Not trusting in Him. Yes He did provide what I needed to survive but did I trust Him with the rest.

A few months ago these words were placed upon my heart - "Be still and know that I am God" (Psalm 46:10). I worried a lot - I was constantly stressing over everything. But one day in March 2006, I was looking out to some dark clouds and at that moment the sun broke through - "Be still". We worry over everything - our kids, bills, work ...the list could go on. The Lord told me that He can take care of the storms in my life. I just had to TRUST IN HIM. Remember the story of Jesus walking on the water. Peter asked to come upon the water with Him "but when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me!" (Matthew 14:29-31) His focus went unto the waves and Peter turned his focus off of Jesus and he began to sink. That is what I did - I felt like I was drowning. What was dragging me down was the things I didn’t want to let go – not giving it ALL to Jesus.

Recently, I have done an online Bible study called "The theology of everything" (written by Chip Brogden). (A friend here in TJ told me of it - the study is free.) It was a real blessing to me. His study was focused on the verse John 3: 30 - "He must increase; I must decrease". It is so funny that what the author of this study taught me, I was so blind to it. For me to grow, I must die to my selfishness. Sound like a seed doesn't it. All that has happen and all that I've gone through was to show me a revelation of myself (which was not to pretty). I asked the Lord for forgiveness and at that moment I died to my selfishness and more of Christ increased in me.

I will certainly pray for you my dear friend. But don’t be discouraged. The Lord has given you a word: “Humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God so that He may exalt you in due time". Jessid9 – run to the feet of Jesus and stay there. Lean and lean hard – don’t let go but let go of things that are drowning you. Jesus loves you and that is one thing that will not be change – for He does not forget His own.

Love,
Snowrose.

PS – Just to let you know – I still worry and stress. I am still learning to let go as well.


2 Corinthians 4:8-10
We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body.

 

[jiggyfly]

I cant live this lie anymore. I need His will to be done in my life. I want to do what He has called me to do. I want to use the gifts that He has given me to reach out to the lost. I want to use what I have been through in my life to reach to others. My testimony. And I do have faith and hope that it will happen. all in the right time. Its a growing process.

The bottom line is our testimony is about His Goodness, Righteousness, Faithfulness and Forgiveness. Our testimony should not be about how faithful, good or even forgiving we have become. I mess up all the time, but God is faithful in forgiving me. Sister, christian religion says, "live the life of Christ" but christian relationship says "live life in Christ". If you have returned to the Lord and asked for His forgiveness, then you have it and you are completely restored to Him. Now instead of trying to live like Christ for Christ, live in Christ with Christ.

 

[Dreamer]

I love you, jessie. You have been so strong on my mind and heart these past few months and now I know why. I was supposed to have been praying for you. Jesus loves you and wants you to share your sorrows and problems with your sisters and brothers in Christ. He even wants you to share your mistakes. Your true sisters and brothers in Christ won't judge you. They will pray for you and encourage you to be the woman God called you to be. I love you and I will be praying for you.

In Christ,
Jan (Dreamer)

 

[jessid9]

Thank you for your prayers. Today is day 2. Ive decided to start attending church as often as I can. I also decided that I need to make some changes. and I'm hoping to get more involved in the church. I stopped by there today and they prayed with me an gave me some information on young adult activities. And I have also realized that theres a bigger picture than I'm seeing. And as I was told today that I need to make the decision to follow God.. and once I do God will give me the strength. absolutly true. He will do the rest. I just need to lay everything down at his feet and know that He is God. And that Hes got everything under control. and the major issue that God would work on my toughned heart. And He is. I'm starting to see changes. even in the way I think. The one thing that was hard to grasp that despite what Ive done... God still loves me. Despite anything. Last 7 months Ive been carrying this feeling of guilt, regret and fear. Fear of openeing up. So I had put barriers up.. unintentionally. I guesse so that no one really knows who I am or what Ive been through. KNowing that I have completely did a detour as to What God had for me. But thats the beauty of Gods forgiveness. Now I have made the desciosion to follow God at whatever cost.
I'm tired of living a lie that I cant be alone. That I need to be with someone. the feelings of being alone are normal. But its how you deal with it right?

I wanted to say thank you again for your prayers. Great things are going to happen. So long as I stand firm in the word of God. Despite what this day brings.... I will thank God! Despite other storms that may come my way... it doesnt matter. God is ever so faithful, ever so loving, ever so forgiving!

Thank you again. May God continue to richly bless you all.

 

[Snowrose]

Hi Jessid9

I just wanted to say that I am so excited for you in your decision. I will continue to pray that our Father will reveal more of Himself to you and that you will grow into a deeper relationship with Him.

1 Thessalonians 5: 23-24 - "May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. The one who calls you is faithful and he will do it."

God bless you sister.

Love,
Snowrose