Taking a risk!

[rawprawn]

I am very hesitant to expose myself here for several reasons. I'm actually hoping that God, the Holy Spirit will actually help me and so I'm stepping out and posting this here in the hope that God can work through this forum. I probably should not do this. I am an ex Christian with a long and winding history. I know that Jesus is the way, the only real way to peace of mind and a life of satisfaction. The things that Jesus said in the Bible are profound. Here is the kicker. I cannot change myself. A leopard cannot change his own spots. So I really do not know what to do. The battle rages on :baffle:

 

[farout]

I am very hesitant to expose myself here for several reasons. I'm actually hoping that God, the Holy Spirit will actually help me and so I'm stepping out and posting this here in the hope that God can work through this forum. I probably should not do this. I am an ex Christian with a long and winding history. I know that Jesus is the way, the only real way to peace of mind and a life of satisfaction. The things that Jesus said in the Bible are profound. Here is the kicker. I cannot change myself. A leopard cannot change his own spots. So I really do not know what to do. The battle rages on :baffle:

I told you befor I read your profile, remember? At 51 years of age you have had a lot of time to think and give God plenty of thought. The Bible tells us some people will reject Him. As much as He loves you, maybe it's just not enough for you? Perhaps you just can not believe Jesus will send those who reject His love into eternal suffering?

Why do you think you are being so risky? Has something happend in your life that you hate God for?

I am willng to chat with ya if you want.

 

[Brighthouse]

Brother Rawprawn, You are so correct in that you cannot change yourself!! Like you, I have been around the block more then a few times in my walk,I am 60.There are two words the lord took out of my speech,can't, and try. That is because he already knows me. lol When we were very young we went to school,we went not only because we were forced to,but also with full knowledge that what we did learn, we could not have learned this by ourself,for me the reason was I was just plain lazy!! LOl After 2 tours in Vietnam I heard about as much about Jesus as i cared to,those who wanted to speak to me about him,had no change in there life.

So what is so much better about Jesus I told them! You are the same as me, only you say you believe,I do not kid myself! Much happened to me brother,to long to go into here. I do not wish for you to fall asleep reading. lol If we are willing to learn Jesus will teach us brother!!( 1 john 2:27) Believing upon our Jesus requires us to do something.First we must renew our mind,( col 3:2and rom 12:1-2)and we can only do this by staying in his word. True, you do have to be willing!! You know this, as you did state at one time you were a believer.

Now you are looking for God to confirm something to you. As Jesus lives,I show you this in love to confirm something you have always wondered about.( Isaiah 41:9-13) The will of God himself brother is that all be with him in heaven.Even us brother! ( 1 Tim 2:3-5) knowledge you already have,it is wisdom you seek,and this wisdom can only come from one who we are following daily bro ( Proverbs8). please look at verse 17! I love those who love me,that brother is not just words but rather a promise! And those who diligently seek me will find me!

So the question we have to answer good brother is how bad do we wish Jesus in every area of our life?I had to answer this myself,as you do. But Jesus hopes, as we do! ( rom 15:13) by who's power??? hehe Correct!!! Holy Spirit Power! The word taken from Isaiah was the given to me by someone I did not even know,even as you do not know me.As i went to my bedroom to consider these words given,there was a piece of paper on my bed which simply said this! ( hebrews 13:2)" Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers,for by this some have entertained angels without knowing it! I am not an angel brother!LOL

I just know Jesus real well! And far better!!! he knows me and loves me as he does you! ( acts 10:34) We work so hard sometimes looking to earn the love we know we do not deserve brother,when all Jesus wants for us to do is simply believe! God is good, because God is good!! Not based upon what we do right or wrong!! His love does not function whether or not we give money to the church,or even if we do not have a simple kind word for anyone on any given day! So why do we do these things then? ( 1 thess 5:18!!) Because we know what we deserve,and are to be, and ever stay thankful!! I sure am brother! if you go to Holy Spirit school as I call it,this you will learn,and why!

We cannot give love or peace or comfort until we first receive this bro! this we learn, IF!! we are willing. It is not that you can't.It is like me, I had no reason to before I went to school bro! Jesus himself gave me every reason now! this I had to learn. I speak to you as jesus would have me speak this late night for me.( 1:20am) why?? Because brother!! Jesus loves you!! My prayers are with you! ( psalms 27:13!!) Your brother in Christ mark

 

[eddieb]

I am very hesitant to expose myself here for several reasons. I'm actually hoping that God, the Holy Spirit will actually help me and so I'm stepping out and posting this here in the hope that God can work through this forum. I probably should not do this. I am an ex Christian with a long and winding history. I know that Jesus is the way, the only real way to peace of mind and a life of satisfaction. The things that Jesus said in the Bible are profound. Here is the kicker. I cannot change myself. A leopard cannot change his own spots. So I really do not know what to do. The battle rages on :baffle:

Many christians have walked away from God, and before, even me. And right now I see a whole lot of God calling the sheep that have strayed back into the fold. The bible says our very best is as filthy rags before God and the term used for "filthy rags" is descriptive of rags used to wrap lepers wounds. bloody puss-oozing, infectious waste covered rags that is good for nothing but to be burned in a fire. So it dosent really matter if you change yourself or not by your own power. You see God wants the glory. God wants to heal you. We know this is true because Jesus Christ dies on the cross to pay for our sins. God is the potter and we are the clay. He is the one that wants to mold us and make us as He pleases and sees fit. You said "you are an ex-christian"... what does the bible say... never will He leave us, never will He forsake us. It also says the gifts and the calling are without repentance. God will never "go away" instead we think He is "gone" because we have stepped away from Him. It is us that walks away from Him. Everyones story and circumstance is diffrent but in God there is no variance, in God there is no diffrence, in God there is no respect to persons. God "hides" from us to cause us to seek after him. the bible says to seek His face. When you seek Him in honesty and meekness and with an attitude of repentance in your heart He will show up. Now earlier I said it doesn't matter if you change yourself or not however it dose matter that whatever sin you have you repent of. God is able and willing to help/change you and I could tell you so many stories of when I was unable to by my own power change myself, but when I came to the place in my heart where even though I doubted I could change but I wanted God more than my sin and I turned from my sin, God helped me or God delivered me. God dose not desire that even one should perish.
Also I would like to point out there is no good in the flesh, so what do you think the reason is you are here saying you hope God/The Holy Spirit will help you... is it of the flesh or the (Holy) Spirit? Is hope of the flesh? God is already working in your heart now. Keep seeking, keep praying, keep repenting, keep following.

 

[RJ]

Many christians have walked away from God, and before, even me. And right now I see a whole lot of God calling the sheep that have strayed back into the fold. The bible says our very best is as filthy rags before God and the term used for "filthy rags" is descriptive of rags used to wrap lepers wounds. bloody puss-oozing, infectious waste covered rags that is good for nothing but to be burned in a fire. So it dosent really matter if you change yourself or not by your own power. You see God wants the glory. God wants to heal you. We know this is true because Jesus Christ dies on the cross to pay for our sins. God is the potter and we are the clay. He is the one that wants to mold us and make us as He pleases and sees fit. You said "you are an ex-christian"... what does the bible say... never will He leave us, never will He forsake us. It also says the gifts and the calling are without repentance. God will never "go away" instead we think He is "gone" because we have stepped away from Him. It is us that walks away from Him. Everyones story and circumstance is diffrent but in God there is no variance, in God there is no diffrence, in God there is no respect to persons. God "hides" from us to cause us to seek after him. the bible says to seek His face. When you seek Him in honesty and meekness and with an attitude of repentance in your heart He will show up. Now earlier I said it doesn't matter if you change yourself or not however it dose matter that whatever sin you have you repent of. God is able and willing to help/change you and I could tell you so many stories of when I was unable to by my own power change myself, but when I came to the place in my heart where even though I doubted I could change but I wanted God more than my sin and I turned from my sin, God helped me or God delivered me. God dose not desire that even one should perish.
Also I would like to point out there is no good in the flesh, so what do you think the reason is you are here saying you hope God/The Holy Spirit will help you... is it of the flesh or the (Holy) Spirit? Is hope of the flesh? God is already working in your heart now. Keep seeking, keep praying, keep repenting, keep following.

You were a Christian before, with God dwelling in you and "walked away" to the point of absolute rejection of Jesus Christ or you pulled away to the point of doubt?

 

[rawprawn]

I told you befor I read your profile, remember? At 51 years of age you have had a lot of time to think and give God plenty of thought. The Bible tells us some people will reject Him. As much as He loves you, maybe it's just not enough for you? Perhaps you just can not believe Jesus will send those who reject His love into eternal suffering?

Why do you think you are being so risky? Has something happend in your life that you hate God for?



I am willng to chat with ya if you want.

farout at my age I certainly have had enough time to work things out, and plenty of experience with and without God. Fact is, I haven't done so yet. There is so much information that roles around in my head, so many different perspectives. For many people having faith seems to be very easy, and I admire those people, even envy them at times. It is just not so easy for me.
As far as the risk I take in posting this here, many years of experience working with and dealing with "Christians" has lead me to be very wary of exposing myself to them, especially at a time when I am trying to reconnect with God and His Son Jesus. I do think, deep down, that my time has come and gone. Jesus said that we can speak against Him and survive, but if we grieve the Holy Spirit out of our lives, that it is. I "feel" as though I have passed that point and that their is no real turning back now. And, here I am trying anyway. Who knows what will happen?

 

[rawprawn]

if you go to Holy Spirit school

Brighthouse I know this is the answer, I know that the Holy Spirit is the solution to my problem. I have no control over that. I'll just keep reading the Gospel for now and see what eventuates. I am a bit of a hard nut to crack and if I have warn out my welcome with God, so be it. I'll just live life best way I can and see what happens.

 

[rawprawn]

You were a Christian before, with God dwelling in you and "walked away" to the point of absolute rejection of Jesus Christ or you pulled away to the point of doubt?

Absolute rejection. i became an atheist bar one point: I retained the belief that the world was created,not by accident but by a greater mind or power. I still see religion as the creation of human beings. All of the worlds religions including "Christianity" with all of it's denominations are human inventions in my opinion. When Christians kneel in church and bow their head toward the people at the front of the church,they are submitting to, worshiping those people and the organisation. Fact is God showed me this many years ago,that my relationship needed to be with Him alone and not with any organisation. i, like an idiot, missed the point and went off to become fully involved and employed by an organisation, effectively selling my soul to that organisation. I think it is impossible to be in relationship with God, and an organisation at the same time. My allegiance needs to be to one or the other. Once a person aligns them self with a human organisation, they are always forced to compromise their relationship with God. Once we start to compromise, it becomes a slippery slop very quickly. This is the mistake I made 26 years ago. This is why I do not believe pastors, ministers should be paid by an organisation. Once a person is dependent on an organisation, it is very very hard to avoid compromising your integrity and your honest relationship with God. Almost impossible I'd say. I left the organisation I was employed by in order to restore my integrity. A lot of damage was done during the time I was employed by that organisation and I eventually walked away from God altogether. I do think He is working on my though and calling me back. I think integrity is our connection with God.

 

[RJ]

Absolute rejection. i became an atheist bar one point: I retained the belief that the world was created,not by accident but by a greater mind or power. I still see religion as the creation of human beings. All of the worlds religions including "Christianity" with all of it's denominations are human inventions in my opinion. When Christians kneel in church and bow their head toward the people at the front of the church,they are submitting to, worshiping those people and the organisation. Fact is God showed me this many years ago,that my relationship needed to be with Him alone and not with any organisation. i, like an idiot, missed the point and went off to become fully involved and employed by an organisation, effectively selling my soul to that organisation. I think it is impossible to be in relationship with God, and an organisation at the same time. My allegiance needs to be to one or the other. Once a person aligns them self with a human organisation, they are always forced to compromise their relationship with God. Once we start to compromise, it becomes a slippery slop very quickly. This is the mistake I made 26 years ago. This is why I do not believe pastors, ministers should be paid by an organisation. Once a person is dependent on an organisation, it is very very hard to avoid compromising your integrity and your honest relationship with God. Almost impossible I'd say. I left the organisation I was employed by in order to restore my integrity. A lot of damage was done during the time I was employed by that organisation and I eventually walked away from God altogether. I do think He is working on my though and calling me back. I think integrity is our connection with God.

That was a question eddieb.
But while we are at it, this is a Talk Jesus forum and not a anti-talk Jesus forum.
A believer understands that the way to God is through Jesus and Jesus alone: John 14:6
Possibly in your case, John 6:44 would apply.
Most would say the order is Jesus, God, family then church. The point here is a relationship with the devine is of the utmost importance, everything else is secondary, including an "organization" as you put it!
You are here for a reason and it is never too late, up to the point of your physical death.

 

[farout]

farout at my age I certainly have had enough time to work things out, and plenty of experience with and without God. Fact is, I haven't done so yet. There is so much information that roles around in my head, so many different perspectives. For many people having faith seems to be very easy, and I admire those people, even envy them at times. It is just not so easy for me.
As far as the risk I take in posting this here, many years of experience working with and dealing with "Christians" has lead me to be very wary of exposing myself to them, especially at a time when I am trying to reconnect with God and His Son Jesus. I do think, deep down, that my time has come and gone. Jesus said that we can speak against Him and survive, but if we grieve the Holy Spirit out of our lives, that it is. I "feel" as though I have passed that point and that their is no real turning back now. And, here I am trying anyway. Who knows what will happen?

Now friend i really is up to you. The choice is yous. If you die tommrow where do you want to spend eternity? Hell is no joke. To ignore it much longer could be your last chance.

 

[SpiritLedEd]

I am very hesitant to expose myself here for several reasons. I'm actually hoping that God, the Holy Spirit will actually help me and so I'm stepping out and posting this here in the hope that God can work through this forum. I probably should not do this. I am an ex Christian with a long and winding history.


All by myself I have no power to change myself. That's within the purview of the Holy Spirit as I surrender my will and my life to Jesus on a regular basis

Spirit Led Ed (SLE)

 

[eddieb]

You were a Christian before, with God dwelling in you and "walked away" to the point of absolute rejection of Jesus Christ or you pulled away to the point of doubt?

I made the conscious choice not to follow after God anymore and to do whatever I wanted. I had been praying for a long time and it didnt seem God was answering my prayer or helping me and i got mad at Him. Decided if He wasnt going to help me why did I need Him? I still knew He was God tho. And there was some stuff I still wouldnt do sin-wise because I knew if I did it would be bad for me and even tho I had turned I still had fear. So I dont know that i can say absolute rejection. And as far as doubt, well, for whatever reason God saw fit I have had encounters with God that, from what I have been told, most christians never experience on this side of eternity I have heard Him speak many times outloud not just as "a still quiet voice" so I can never really doubt he is real.
It truly is the dumbest thing I ever did and I have done alot of dumb things in life. uncountable dumb stuff. But He forgave me and I am so very thankful that even as I type this my screen is blurry from tears building up in my eyes.

Lamentations 3:22 It is of the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.

psalm 136 O give thanks unto the Lord; for he is good: for his mercy endureth for ever

Even after I turned back he reaffirmed in me He never left my side.

 

[brakelite]

I am very hesitant to expose myself here for several reasons. I'm actually hoping that God, the Holy Spirit will actually help me and so I'm stepping out and posting this here in the hope that God can work through this forum. I probably should not do this. I am an ex Christian with a long and winding history. I know that Jesus is the way, the only real way to peace of mind and a life of satisfaction. The things that Jesus said in the Bible are profound. Here is the kicker. I cannot change myself. A leopard cannot change his own spots. So I really do not know what to do. The battle rages on :baffle:

Hello rawprawn. heh, your user name is a classic.
I have mever been in your situation, so I cannot truly identify with it, but I did find myself in a situation 18 years or so ago entirely of my own making and one from which I could not get out of. There were no human means by which I could avoid certain catastrophe. I hadn't deliberately walked away from God, but rather let things 'slide' until over several years found myself totally bereft of any spiritual life. I was living in a manner no different from any secular non-Christian...and no better than I had lived before meeting Christ 20 years previously. I hadn't stopped believing,...I have never gone the atheist route...but believing and not living up to that belief is worse than not believing at all. So I was in trouble. Big time. Circumstances had developed in my personal life and those closest to me that spelt an end to all hope.

So what I did was give up. I got to my knees in a lonely place completely free from any chance of interruption and completely emptied myself of every vestige of pride, ego, self interest,, ambition, ownership, and surrendered my entire being to the Only One I knew who could repair the damage I had caused. This was not simply a matter of confessing sin. This went deeper than professing faith.
In Japanese culture a surrender such as I submitted to Jesus is considered a shame, and suicide is seen as the only honorable solution. But in Christianity it is the opposite. Jesus said that in order to find our lives we must lose them. This is what I gave up. My life. And Jesus then gave it back to me. But a different one. Not the lost, broken, pathetic, sin-laden selfish angry addicted excuse for a life I claimed as my own, but a new life free from guilt, shame, and sickness. Jesus began healing all the relationships I had broken...all the lives I had potentially ruined...and continues to do so today. The hurts we cause others can run very deep, and it can take years to heal. But God is faithful, and His mercy and grace endures forever. God offers you a new life. A new start. A fresh beginning. The old dies in Christ...the new rises with Him and the most precious aspect of this new life is that it has hope. And hope rawprawn we can never have enough of.
"I know the thoughts I think toward you saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you grounds for hope." Jeremiah 29:11 (Brakelite version)
Chad has just posted a good article on losing one's life in Bible Study. . It is very good.

 

[rawprawn]

Now friend i really is up to you. The choice is yous. If you die tommrow where do you want to spend eternity? Hell is no joke. To ignore it much longer could be your last chance.

If I die tomorrow, God will judge. That is not my problem. "Many are called, few are chosen". Salvation is God's business, not mine. I think it is a trap many fall into thinking we can determine our salvation.

 

[rawprawn]

Unfortunately Brakelite I have already been through the process you are talking about where I gave up everything and God took over. I know the sense of complete change, or being crushed and set free at the same time ago. I guess I am at a different point now and God is pulling me back for some reason. All I know, all I want to know, is that Jesus really was the Messiah, the genetic Son of God, the only way we can find satisfaction in life. I'm not too worried about the afterlife. I think what Jesus teaches helps my satisfaction in this life.

 

[RJ]

I made the conscious choice not to follow after God anymore and to do whatever I wanted. I had been praying for a long time and it didnt seem God was answering my prayer or helping me and i got mad at Him. Decided if He wasnt going to help me why did I need Him? I still knew He was God tho. And there was some stuff I still wouldnt do sin-wise because I knew if I did it would be bad for me and even tho I had turned I still had fear. So I dont know that i can say absolute rejection. And as far as doubt, well, for whatever reason God saw fit I have had encounters with God that, from what I have been told, most christians never experience on this side of eternity I have heard Him speak many times outloud not just as "a still quiet voice" so I can never really doubt he is real.
It truly is the dumbest thing I ever did and I have done alot of dumb things in life. uncountable dumb stuff. But He forgave me and I am so very thankful that even as I type this my screen is blurry from tears building up in my eyes.

Lamentations 3:22 It is of the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.

psalm 136 O give thanks unto the Lord; for he is good: for his mercy endureth for ever

Even after I turned back he reaffirmed in me He never left my side.

You didn't answer my question directly.

• From what you answered above, I will assume that you pulled back from God and you did not totally reject his existence or complete unbelief.
• "Falling Away" means Apostasy : Apostasy in Christianity refers to the rejection of Christianity.
• Not the same as what happened to you.

 

[Rev T.S.Perkins]

My brother raw pawn ! Lots to read on here Ben trying to keep up ! First no such thing as an ex Christian ! Only some one so far away from God to be the most meserable of men after being so close ! I walked out of the pulpit for 10 yrs due to shame of divorce and went astray , but I tell you you've serve a loving God in the past ! He hasn't changed you did , you say you can't change Then don't ! God made you as you are for His purpose alone .i did the walk like a Christian image for awhile ( cookie cutter christian ) did more damage than Good i think . God called you to love Him and give him Praise due , to accept the act of reedemtion towards us in Jesus Gods only son . God still loves you and waits like the father of the prodigal son watching for you're return and this time may Egypt be far from you're Heart and may the God of second chances reveal Himself to you a new ,,,condemnation is of the devil but COVICTION IS OF GOD because He loves us so ...,,Rev

 

[Brighthouse]

A good point Rawpoint!! The ability to ever trust others again is never easy! I made the very same mistake bro! I told my Pastor some things in confidence and one week later everyone knew! Words I cannot use here, as you did not, but you sure get the hint! And so I went off for a while the Lone ranger for Jesus!! Yahoo!! lol I do not need others,what good are they anyway! They wish you to submit to them,and do not even know what a servant is themselves! I get it bro!

After some time of walking away myself, the Lord helped me to see some things I did not either know, or wish to see myself.1. I am not a religion! 2. I am not the building people gather at! 3.YOU are this to me!! ( Isaiah 43:10!) I dwell inside you,so each of my people represent there part in my Church as a whole! If anyone thinks themselves to be a little god,(as was true in my case,not me, but a pastor) remind him of this please!!( acts 10:24-26!!) I am just a man!Peter said! I do not know any Peters around here myself bro lol A new beginning, is not a bad ending brother! I learned this the hard way myself,i just had to be willing to begin anew that's all. My prayers are with you! To follow means to always go forward,never backwards! God will make your path straight,we just have to allow him to always take our lead.( proverbs 3:5-6) It takes time bro,i should know I am 60! LOL blessing.

 

[Christ4Ever]

I am very hesitant to expose myself here for several reasons. I'm actually hoping that God, the Holy Spirit will actually help me and so I'm stepping out and posting this here in the hope that God can work through this forum. I probably should not do this. I am an ex Christian with a long and winding history. I know that Jesus is the way, the only real way to peace of mind and a life of satisfaction. The things that Jesus said in the Bible are profound. Here is the kicker. I cannot change myself. A leopard cannot change his own spots. So I really do not know what to do. The battle rages on

First let me say I love you rawprawn.

Never heard of an ex-Christian. Heard of some back-sliding ones, tired ones, old ones, young ones, the list goes on, but ex ones? Nope.

So if you were truly repentant, found forgiveness at the Cross, and believed that Jesus Christ died for the remission of sins. Then I would say at worse, you've back-slid. I've added a link below this to a devotional that was posted that I pray will help you, and show you that it's okay. You are in the best of hands no matter what has transpired in those years since you've walked a different path for a time. Once you've become His, you are His indeed!! (Ephesians 1:13)

http://www.talkjesus.com/devotionals/47751-backslider-do-not-despair.html#post235628

If this is the case above, then even though your bio says you are not born again. You have been, but might never have realized it that you were. Too often, the newly born believer is not discipled by a more mature, meat eating one. If you know what I mean by what I just said, you are further along then you even realize yourself.

This just might be the very reason you have found your way to Talk Jesus! There are many solid brothers & sisters in Christ Jesus, who will pray, cry, walk with you, listen, guide, even help to disciple you and that doesn't even include the One that is already working inside you right now!


Now if you are not. If you can't ever say that you believed that Jesus Christ died on that Cross for you a sinner, and rose again on that faithful third day. If it was those years ago an intellectual, minus the acknowledgment of how lacking you are or any of us are without His Sacrifice to finding Hope, a redemption with God through Him. Then you need to do so now! Don't hesitate, for all you've been doing all these years ago, was playing religion. Going through rituals of behavior, or performance that left you still empty, which is what you might be feeling right now!

This too may have been the reason you've been lead to Talk Jesus! To find Salvation through His Grace, which requires nothing of you but acceptance of the Sacrifice of His Son Jesus Christ on the Cross. Which you could never have done by you or anyone else. Cleansed you of everything that has separated you from God, which is Sin, through the shedding of blood of an innocent who did this in place or you, me and everyone! Believe in Him! He died so that you may live, and live more fully then you ever have a right to, or have ever lived before!
There is nothing magic about this. No special formula that must be accomplished. His Word says "If thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved" Romans 10:9

You can do that no matter where you happen to be. Talk to Him, He's waiting to hear from you!

If you do this, then come break bread with us. Let your brothers & sisters be your fellowship, your helpers, through the Blood of the Lamb, that is a stronger bond than anything made of man, and one that will last an eternity!

Praying for you, that you will be either reinforced or saved. That in his salvation that you may allow us to rejoice with him as he grows in knowledge and the Hope that is Your Son Christ Jesus, who is in us! Lord hear our supplications on behalf of this man! Touch his heart, mind and spirit, that he may know with a certainty that he is Yours either as one newly arrived or one who has returned from a long journey. That a place at the banquet table that is prepared for those who love and follow You is set aside for him. Through and in the name of your Son Christ Jesus, who said if we were to ask You anything in His name, that it would be so. We ask this merciful Father. Always to Your Glory! Amen.
C4E
<><

 

[eddieb]

If I die tomorrow, God will judge. That is not my problem. "Many are called, few are chosen". Salvation is God's business, not mine. I think it is a trap many fall into thinking we can determine our salvation.

few are chosen based upon their response to The Word of God or their response to obey God. God made us free will beings to choose. Dont believe it? two trees in the middle of the garden of eden. the tree of life and the tree of knowledge of good and evil. This is from deuteronomy 30:

11 For this commandment which I command thee this day, it is not hidden from thee, neither is it far off.
12 It is not in heaven, that thou shouldest say, Who shall go up for us to heaven, and bring it unto us, that we may hear it, and do it?
13 Neither is it beyond the sea, that thou shouldest say, Who shall go over the sea for us, and bring it unto us, that we may hear it, and do it?
14 But the word is very nigh unto thee, in thy mouth, and in thy heart, that thou mayest do it.
15 See, I have set before thee this day life and good, and death and evil;
16 In that I command thee this day to love the Lord thy God, to walk in his ways, and to keep his commandments and his statutes and his judgments, that thou mayest live and multiply: and the Lord thy God shall bless thee in the land whither thou goest to possess it.
17 But if thine heart turn away, so that thou wilt not hear, but shalt be drawn away, and worship other gods, and serve them;
18 I denounce unto you this day, that ye shall surely perish, and that ye shall not prolong your days upon the land, whither thou passest over Jordan to go to possess it.
19 I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live:
20 That thou mayest love the Lord thy God, and that thou mayest obey his voice, and that thou mayest cleave unto him: for he is thy life, and the length of thy days: that thou mayest dwell in the land which the Lord sware unto thy fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, to give them.


Salvation is by grace thru faith and every person is given the measure of faith unto salvation. The words of yours that I have quoted above do not reflect one who is seeking God or realize that He is our only hope. God hears the prayers of a contrite/broken spirit. You have recieved good advise from this site. If you truley wish to restore your relationship with God you will do it His way because He is the way, the truth, and the life. There is no other way.