When I was a young guy coming of age, it occurred to me that if I were as naturally
pleasing to God as His son Jesus always is, then it would be very easy to attain to
Heaven, and to stay in Heaven, without fear of being kicked out: that would be the
cat's meow.
● John 8:29 . . He that sent me is with me: the Father has not left me alone; for I
do always those things that please Him.
I was very surprised, and excited, upon discovering that something very similar to
the thing I wished for is contained in a promise that God made to Moses' people.
● Ezek 36:24-27 . . I will gather you up from all the nations and bring you home
again to your land. Then I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean.
Your filth will be washed away, and you will no longer worship idols. And I will give
you a new heart with new and right desires, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will
take out your stony heart of sin and give you a new, obedient heart. And I will put
My spirit in you so you will obey My laws and do whatever I command.
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It happens that, for many reasons, we understand what Jesus says on the same Gospel differently.
I focus my readings on Jesus' sayings and life only after I started reading the Gospel when I was 17 till now.
On your side, you used to believe, as many others do, that Jesus is not enough to know God, and for which purpose we are created. So, you feel the need to read, as possible, the entire Bible (the OT and the NT). For instance, my uncle was a Catholic priest. He also had to study the OT for about 6 years. Then He studied Jesus' life (the 4 Gospels) for about 3 months only. He studied the remaining part of the NT for about 9 months. In other words, the men in charge of the Church don’t see in Jesus a genuine source of any interesting knowledge though they agree He is 'The
Living Word of God’. They believe that the most important knowledge that their Christian believers should have, is provided by certain men inspired from Heaven.
While I read Jesus, I see myself with Him. For example, He used to select the right sort of teachings in each situation He talked. He knew in advance that, on one side, He needs to address Jews of His time and, on the other side, to address the entire world at all times (as addressing me, after 2000 years). With me, He just talks of what I need to know about God's Love. With Jews, He had to do miracles to get their attention and remind them of what their Prophets told them about Him. Naturally, the kind of parables, He gave, had to be also different. To Jews, they were about God, the Supreme King. To me, they are of whatever could be related to God’s Love.
I like to add. Words, as the Idols made by stones, are made by men. It happens I knew Jesus, my Heavenly Father and the Holy Spirit in spirit only and not because of any specific words, said holy or not.