verbally abusive older parents

Denise61

Member
how do you deal with older verbally abusive parents that does not have dementia iam older myself?
 
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Lord says to Honor them regardless how they are..

Me i had to set boundaries with my mom also i moved states away..

In order for me to honor them i cant be too close as in distance with them my mom mainly shes very high strung can he verbally nasty at times i must keep my cool.. actually since i moved states away this time our relationship as a mother and daughter has grown ive set my boundaries if she is too mean when she calls i tell her ma i cant do this right now im not in the right state of mind..i had to do that often at first but now it is a rare occasion..

Set boundaries and do your best to honor them.. that means doing what you need to do in order to deal with the situation.. personally i had to ask the Lord how to forgive my family
 
Greetings,

I think, too, that it depends a bit on how much we truly want to love. Does our flesh get in the way?

While we were yet sinners....
Who gave Himself for who...
and why?

Of grace we have received

Let us not deny the power thereof

If we are dead in our sins, it matters nothing.
If we are alive in Christ, it costs us nothing.


Bless you ....><>
 
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Kindness, respectful, not give bad back, but don`t give them anything they can use against you and limit your contact to what you can handle. Change subject, walk up, leave, go to the bathroom, say something short and change subject if they persist say you do not want to discuss those things. etc. You can tell them that was not nice, and then same apply. Do not fuel it. try to get their minds on to something positive. And yes show love.
 
Greetings,

In an orchestra, follow the conductor

In all your ways
lean not on your own understanding
Acknowledge Him
and He shall direct thy paths.
Proverbs 3


Bless you ....><>
 
how do you deal with older verbally abusive parents that does not have dementia iam older myself?

Respecting and honouring your parents is something you do out of obedience to God.

It is a virtue that can influence your parents and potentially lead them closer to the Lord. Our conduct can be a testimony to others and can point them toward Christ.

Direct verse:

“Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother...” — Ephesians 6:1–2

An example where conduct can lead to conversion:

“Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives.” — 1 Peter 3:1
 
If one have not went through severe childhood abuse, to the point of trying to take their lives, if one cannot relate to that, they really cannot say much. Because they will only have a limited capacity of understanding. Some people may have the grace to still have contact while others don`t, to protect their sanity, to avoid being re traumatised.
I for mine, yes they did try to kill me, strangle me to the few inches point as a child, it was on a hanging hair, combined with years and years of abuse, I do not feel bitterness or any negative feelings. It is God`s grace. I`m able to still show being nice and all that contains. But not all are like that. For some it is too much. too much trauma.
 
If one have not went through severe childhood abuse, to the point of trying to take their lives, if one cannot relate to that, they really cannot say much. Because they will only have a limited capacity of understanding. Some people may have the grace to still have contact while others don`t, to protect their sanity, to avoid being re traumatised.
I for mine, yes they did try to kill me, strangle me to the few inches point as a child, it was on a hanging hair, combined with years and years of abuse, I do not feel bitterness or any negative feelings. It is God`s grace. I`m able to still show being nice and all that contains. But not all are like that. For some it is too much. too much trauma.

I’m sorry for what you went through, but suffering is not a prerequisite for understanding, obeying, or applying Scripture. Personal experience may affect how someone relates to an issue, but Scripture remains the authority, not our personal experiences.
 
I’m sorry for what you went through, but suffering is not a prerequisite for understanding, obeying, or applying Scripture. Personal experience may affect how someone relates to an issue, but Scripture remains the authority, not our personal experiences.
You fail to understand the reality of what trauma does to people, some people cannot have contact even because they get retraumatised, especially when the abusers have not changed but carry on the abuse
 
God does NOT require people to keep being abused. He does not even require it in a marriage. Many people, not me but many, that have experienced abuse keep cracking when they are exposed to more of the same, or have to relate to the perpetrator. In those circumstances the most loving for everyone is low to little contact.
 
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