@Loving Avalanche
Add bookmark Jun 28, 2010 #1
I am married, but not legally. My husband and I can't afford to have a wedding or get rings right now, but we have prayed to god to accept our marriage and have told him that we are married. Do you have to get married by a priest to actually be married in god's eyes?
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Greetings
There are ideas shared in this thread, regarding marriage that are misleading as they do not agree with scripture.
Let us have a look at what the scriptures actually tell us on the subject of marriage.
There are two testaments in the Bible, the old and the new.
There are two covenants in the Bible, the old and the new.
Marriage is included in both, spiritually and in the flesh.
Starting with a brief look at the OT, the Old Covenant was essentially a marriage covenant, by which God "was a husband" to Israel. Jeremiah 31:32
In this covenant, Israel, the wife, had agreed to submit to God and obey His laws. But she did not. Israel's adultery with foreign gods was so heinous that God divorced His people except for a few who still tried to serve Him. Jeremiah 3:8
The book of Hebrews in the NT explains, the problem was the fault with the people under the Old Covenant, therefore a New Covenant was necessary. Hebrews 8:7-8.
In short, the new covenant is the gospel and marriage is its central theme.
God who created man and woman, also created marriage of one man and one woman, they will become one flesh, through marriage, joined by God, in the NT through Jesus.
Regarding the two becoming one flesh we read…
4 Jesus said to them, “Have you not read that He who made
them at the beginning
‘made them male and female,’
5 and said,
‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?
6 So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” Matthew 19:4-6 (NKJV)
Marriage of one man and one woman is to be honoured, undefiled, and God will judge them.
Let marriage be held in honour among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous. Hebrews 13:4 (NKJV)
Marriage and the law of God
For a married woman is bound
by law to her husband while he lives, but if her husband dies she is released from the
law of marriage. Romans 7:2 (NKJV)
The duties of the husband and wife, just as the ‘Church’, the ‘ekklesia’, is subject to Christ Jesus.
22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
23 For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body.
24 Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so
let the wives
be to their own husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her,
26 that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word,
27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.
28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself.
29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord
does the church.
30 For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones.
31
“For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”
32 This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife
see that she respects
her husband.
Ephesians 5:22-33 (NKJV)
Let us now look in more details to the run up to marriage of one man and one woman from scripture
Jesus gave a marriage proposal to His bride, under the new covenant.
27 Then He took the cup, and gave thanks, and gave
it to them, saying, “Drink from it, all of you.
28 For this is My blood of the new covenant, which is shed for many for the remission of sins.
Matthew 26:27-28 (NKJV)
Jesus was explaining that the shedding of His blood as a sacrifice for sin was required to make the New Covenant possible. Without it, there was no way to atone for the sins of all who would participate in the covenant. Wine is part of the new covenant.
We also notice that Jesus was here initiating the New Covenant with His disciples.
We must not confuse this with the setting of Jeremiah's prophecy of the New Covenant with Israel and Judah, after Christ's return to earth. Jeremiah 31:31-34
This is important, the "marriage of the Lamb" does not occur until His return, Revelation 19:6-9
6 And I heard, as it were, the voice of a great multitude, as the sound of many waters and as the sound of mighty thunderings, saying, “Alleluia! For the Lord God Omnipotent reigns!
7 Let us be glad and rejoice and give Him glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and His wife has made herself ready.”
8 And to her it was granted to be arrayed in fine linen, clean and bright, for the fine linen is the righteous acts of the saints.
9 Then he said to me, “Write: ‘
Blessed are those who are called to
the marriage supper of the Lamb!’ ” And he said to me, “These are the true sayings of God.”
Revelation 19:6-9 (NKJV)
This is clearly referring to Christ's marriage to the Church, He the groom, the church His Bride.
God's Church is spiritual Israel
28 For he is not a Jew, which is one outwardly; neither is that circumcision, which is outward in the flesh:
29 But he is a Jew, which is one inwardly; and circumcision is that of the heart,
in the spirit, and not in the letter; whose praise is not of men, but of God.
Romans 2:28-29 (KJV)
Jeremiah was a chosen pioneer in the relationship with God. But, this does not explain why the Church is under the terms of the, New Covenant, for marriage today, even though the marriage does not take place until Christ's return.
To understand these things, it is essential we know something about marriage customs in biblical times.
At the time of Jesus, couples initially became betrothed, with a customary shared cup of wine.
This betrothal was not like engagements today, which can easily be broken off.
A Jewish betrothal was ‘a binding contract’ with obligations on both parties. It required a divorce to break it, unlike walking away from an engagement, Jesus clearly did not agree with divorce, as we read about his conversation why Moses allowed it, but He said it was not like that from the beginning.
During this betrothal period the couple was, already considered married. But, regarded as husband and wife, they didn’t live together at this point. This is an important situation to note.
We see this procedure reflected in Matthews Gospel with Mary and Joseph.
18 Now the birth of Jesus Christ was as follows: After His mother Mary was betrothed to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Spirit. 19 Then Joseph her husband, being a just
man, and not wanting to make her a public example, was minded to put her away secretly. 20 But while he thought about these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take to you Mary your wife, for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit Matthew 1:18-20 (NKJV)
Now let us look at another example, let us look at the wedding feast at Cana in Galilee in John chapter 2,
The true meaning in this beautiful passage of scripture is so often missed, clouded by too much emphasis on the two obvious statements in the script.
- The changing of water into wine and
- Mary’s words ‘Do whatever He tells you’
Although very important items in the story, there is a far greater one.
Look at the massive differences as to what was done at the time of Jesus and what people do today.
- Key points to consider at the time of Jesus teaching on earth:
- the offering of wine
- the betrothal
- the time the bride and groom were apart
- the son had gone away for a little while to prepare a place for them
- the fact the bride was waiting for her groom to return
- the fact the son was waiting for the Father to say... ‘Son, go get your bride’
- We can see clearly from scripture:
- Jesus message regarding Himself, the Groom, and
- His Bride, the church, the ekklesia, His body.
- When we are born again from above, we are betrothed to Jesus, promised in marriage.
- He is ‘the Groom’, He is ‘the Head of His Church’, and we are His bride, each a part of the body of Christ, His Church, we are His virgin bride, we are promised to each other, we are faithful to each other.
- We are not to sin! We are in love with the Lord, the groom, we are in His Love when born again, abiding in love.
Let us note also the order for marriage at the time of Jesus Ministry on earth:
- The groom approaches his hopeful bride.
- He offers her wine, when she accepts, it is declared in public.
- The covenant of betrothal, equal to marriage is, written in law, by what was called then a law maker.
In those days, it was common for a couple, to do these things near the gates of the city, because that was where the law makers would be. There was a covenant of marriage in the OT; there is a covenant of marriage in the NT, one in the flesh and one in the spirit.
Jesus was invited to a wedding feast at Cana in Galilee; it was where his first miracle occurred. Jesus took the wedding ceremony of that day and gave us a beautiful parable, he gives us a glimpse towards the day when we who are born again from above, we who have been faithful to His Commands, we who have understood His teaching, and followed by example, we who have shared these with others as faithful disciples will be rewarded, not just with eternity with the Lord, it will be a welcome home like no other, a massive wedding feast with the Lamb of God. Our Saviour and our Lord.
There was in those days a procedure for marriage, there was a covenant, a betrothal of marriage certified.
After the betrothal the couple were parted for a period of time. This may seem strange to us today but it is important not just for the procedure and events of the day, but also for the bigger picture Jesus gives us of the wedding feast he invites us to.
So what actually happened after the legal betrothal in marriage?
The couple would part, the groom would return to his father’s home and start to create a place for His Bride.
The bride would return back to her home and would start to prepare herself for the wedding feast. She and her ladies in waiting, we call bridesmaids, would buy material and make their dresses, preparing and looking forward at all times for when they will be with each other forever, or in the flesh until one soul dies in this life.
How long were they apart?
They were usually apart for up to twelve months though a fixed time was never stated. There was a lot of preparation to be made, the groom preparing a place in the father’s home and the bride getting herself and her ladies in waiting ready. Both had to be ready at all times, because no one knew the day or hour the father tell his son now is the time.
It was only when the father says 'son, go get your bride' that the shofar is sounded, the trumpet call, and at that point the groom goes to get his bride, everyone would come out into the street and will see the groom, they would follow him as he goes and receives his bride unto himself. Then follows the wedding ceremony and wedding feast which all truly born again believers are invited to. What a feast it will be. It was common at the time of Jesus for a wedding feast to run on for a week sometimes two.
It was a joyous occasion, a time for great joy and celebration. And so it will be for the Faithful in Christ when the Father says, ‘Son go get your bride’ and Jesus returns for the born again souls who have been faithful to him.
O come Lord Jesus. Amen
Jesus took the procedure of the day and gave us this beautiful parable, he used the exact pattern of the day to explain what it will be like for the truly born again from above Christians who have followed Jesus’ footsteps, obeyed his commends and remained abiding in him until that very important and very special day when the Father turns to our Lord and says ‘Son go get your bride’
Today’s methods are sin at every level.
We are taught what a marriage was like in scripture, what a marriage should be like, yet we don't see it in the world we live, weddings today are sex first, ceremony later, which so often as to be as quick as possible as the couple cannot wait to get away on an expensive honeymoon. Wedding ceremonies have over the years become a means for yet another party and commercial gain for businesses.
Sin from start to finish, and often afterwards as well!
How many people today could survive a year apart, at that early stage, would one or the other to be tempted to sin, for many I am sure it would. One of the craziest things ever created is the stag and hen nights. But one has to consider, would there be trust by each member being apart for so long, if their love for one another is strong, and their Trust in the Lord was Great, they would be faithful, that is exactly what the Lord asks of us.
But regarding betrothal and the wedding, as we see, it wasn't like it is today, and it was never intended to be like it is today. We are in the Latter Days of these, End Times, today it appears the devil has domain, but it only appears he has domain, his day of reckoning is close, ours could be also.
We really do need to look back at how things were at the time of Jesus on earth, from every prospective, betrothal, marriage, and the church, the ekklesia, so many are living in the today mode, missing so much from Jesus’ teaching and understanding it at the time He was on earth.
What happened at the time of Jesus was a picture for us all, a message for us all, of what a true a true marriage, a true wedding should be, between our Lord and His Church, between the groom, the bride and the father of the groom. The pattern was set for us to learn from, the time line was set with a message pointing us forward, forward to Jesus return with an invite to all to faithful in the Lord to come together for the Wedding Feast of the Lamb,
We are to be virgin brides, preparing for the grooms return, he is coming, our lamps must always be trimmed and filled with oil, we are to be ready any hour, any minute, we are only one step away from fulfilment and it will happen in an instant, at the twinkling of an eye, when the Father says to Jesus, 'Son, go get your bride'.
In His Love
Brother Paul
